It was a very rocky journey for me in this country everyone who had been a part of the beginning knows everything that we have endured. Being a working student is a really humbling experience, kudos to all who became a working student, proud of you all.
It made me stay on the ground which I am not used to. It was hard, too hard for me to do the things that I wasn’t used to doing. But I tried, tried my very best. Worked and fought the culture that I wasn’t used to, I was bullied by the obaasans at my first part-time job. The 2nd day I got sick, felt like I was on fire because the senpais told me that my body was shocked with the hard labor. I cried. And cried, even more, when I felt the concern of the people around me, my roommates at that time, thank you, girls.
I got another job at a cafe, an anime cafe to be exact, which I really liked, I was trained in the food preps area and kitchen, and then later on at the hall. All around I must say. I’m happy I got to tick that off my bucket list. Sadly I had to resign because doing a double job was quite difficult really, I don’t get to have a yasumi (rest day).
And the last job I took since I don’t have any more choice because consequently, we needed to transfer to a further apato (apartment), so no other choice but to have the same work with the rest of the students who were also transferred by our (not) very good school (actually, a bad one, I’ll never recommend). It was the work that I have to endure until the school year ended.
I got bullied.
Bullied real hard by the people who got my trust at first then was attacked the next moment. So I learned to distance myself from people. People I even trusted. I don’t know who to trust anymore. I got depressed, really depressed. I cried on and off, my tears were my best friend. Most of the time, I will just cry in silence while working, while at school, on the road, at a bus, and even when I’m sleeping. I’ll just cry everything off then wipe it away with words of affirmation and belief that this will all shall pass. Then I will pray for more strength and courage.
My inspiration? The Philippines. I don’t know, but I’m eager to go back. I just wanna go back to the Philippines, my comfort place. In my room, crawl in my bed, and enveloped in the warmth of my family’s love. I always always look forward to that day.
With it, I get encouraged instead of spending time with people, I diverted my focus. I study, I studied hard, practice and practice, read, and write. And finally achieved my goal. I passed the JLPT Examination. Good job self. Thank You, God.
Months, and more hard work after.. Graduation day it is. Every students’ goal was to graduate, (and, to finish paying a big amount of money to the school). My so supportive dad (from PH). I took the time to witness. It was also the sign for me to take this opportunity to work until my visa ends the go back home to PH.
I got a new job in a big restaurant, everyone was very nice to me, my co-workers were helpful and my manager was fond of me since he was learning English with me at the same time. Although the time is a little short I get to enjoy working with the chefs in the kitchen.
However, COVID-19 came.
Became a pandemic. It spread across countries, people (famous or not), and everyone panicked. Everyone was scared. I was asked to take a rest for a while from work because there are no customers coming to the restaurant anymore. At the same time the landlord of the apartment was abusing us, the tenants, they were asking for a big money as payment for utilities but there weren’t any bill yet. They would trespass inside our apatos and go inside our rooms, and harass us. Because of that, I packed my bags and decided to leave that dreary place.
I transferred. Luckily, a blessing came. Someone with a kind heart welcomed me and my dad into her home. Then and there my world changed.
I transferred without any plans, as to what will I do next. Instead, I trusted the Lord.
Just at the time I lost interest and will in staying in Japan, I met people whom I will forever be grateful to, who became my family in Japan that almost convinced me not to go. He provided me with people who’d been a channel of blessing for me and my dad. I got a job, my dad also found his mission. We were both really blessed with God’s great provision. Truly God’s plan was always better when you trust Him. Truly His love never failed. But..
I need what I want to do.
I really appreciate these people even more, strangers but became more like a family who welcomed me not only into their house but into their house. If not with them, I wouldn’t realize how blessed I was, how the Lord still cared for me though I came to apoint of uncertainty and despair, and, even after all of the struggles, heartaches, depression, anxiety, and tiredness I could still push and continue. I will always pray for favor, protection, and blessings to all of you that are ver close to my heart Japan version.
It was indeed an unexpected blessing that I will conclude my most-extreme-roller-coaster journey in my life (so far) in Japan with a grateful and a full heart.